moosh on vicodin.

Posted bycasey coombsPosted inToo lazy to label.

Do you ever put off going to the doctor because you’re just sure that as soon as you get there your symptoms will be gone and you’ll be looked at like a crazy lady over-exaggerator?

Yeah, me too.

That’s why I was so pleased last night when I went to the ER with my throat nearly swollen shut and a temperature of 103.4. Call me bonkers but you’d have to be a real pro to fake that. Right Ferris?

Bueller?

Bueller?

And as fate would have it, the doctor that came in to treat me was hot. Hot, hot, hot. I’m pretty sure Cody even thought he was a little hot. Doctor Hot looked me over, made me convince him I wasn’t pregnant, stuck his face in my swamp mouth, had me pee in a cup and told me I had nice teeth *swoon*. Then Doctor Hot had me gargle some thick solution known as viscous lidocaine. Or what I like to call “the solution to make me stop calling you Doctor Hot and not want you near me ever, ever again thankyouverymuch.” The stuff was so nasty that as soon as it hit the back of my tongue I gagged and involuntarily hurtled forward so fast I knocked the glasses off my face with the faucet. Gag. Ick. Cody’s exact words were “Yeah, maybe you shouldn’t gargle it.”

Suck it viscous lidocaine. I’d rather not be able to swallow.

I was given a good old fashioned acetaminophen/ibuprofen cocktail, a diagnosis for some sickness I can’t pronounce but starts with a P and ends with an X and a prescription for an antibiotic, Vicodin, and what? Viscous lidocaine. I lost the last one somewhere between here and the pharmacy, whoops! (Okay, kidding, the pharmacy actually didn’t have any so they had to order it, blah, blah. But I still may “forget” to go pick it up.)

I’ve taken my first Vicodin. I’m waiting for something dramatic to happen. Like, you know, feel better. But in the mean time I have to thank all of my neighbors (K, N, A and A) who have heeded my squeaky hoarse plea to entertain the moosh while I sleep, drink and pee this thing out of me.

I’m now going to go grumble and limp around my house doing my best House impression sporting a pink umbrella as my flame tipped cane.

26 thoughts on “moosh on vicodin.”

  2. Oh crap, I have sorta the same thing (a WEEK now). I can’t get it to go away. Am I gunna hafta go to the doctor? NOOOOOOOOO sayitaintso.

    DAMN! ‘scuse me, that was the flubug talking.

    Hope your drugs kick in soon.

    Darla’s last blog post..Food Budget Announcement…

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  4. I had that a few months ago. I guess it made it’s way to the Midwest. Like you, I was embarassed to go to the doctor because I thought he’d think of me as a wuss.

    I took Vicodin after this weird face surgery I had last summer (my baby broke my face with his wobbly head!). The first few pills left me groggy, then I got terrible nightmares. I threw them out after five or six doses.

    maybe I am a wuss. I can’t even enjoy drugs.

    lora’s last blog post..conspiracy

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  11. Get well soon! I hate being sick and I’m sure you do too!
    Have you tried gargling with warm salt water? Some people think it’s gross so don’t overdo on the salt, but I find that it can really help with the pain…

    Krista’s last blog post..Book: The Big Picture

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  12. I had to use the Viscous Lidocaine (mixed w/Mylanta) I feel your pain. blech….
    The vicodin should kick in for you, hope so. We all had that down here a few weeks ago, still have the after effects and a few vicodin myself. LOL
    At least you got Dr. Hot.
    Hope you feel better soon!

    Chrissy’s last blog post..Brain Freeze

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  19. I had to take Viscous Lidocaine for a ridiculously huge outbreak of mouth ulcers that made my gums swell up and made eating solid food a nightmare. All I had to do was swishy the vile gunk and spit it out, I can’t imagine gargling with it.

    Hopefully the vicodin will make everything and blur and it will be over soon.

    Feel better

    Just Me’s last blog post..This is what is sounds like….

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  21. The last time I had surgery on my foot I had Vicodin for the pain. It knocked me out every time. Pain? Who feels pain while sleeping? I was happy to recover and start being awake again!

    Daisy’s last blog post..That’s My Bag

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  26. So I know you probably won’t see this comment, but I just had to say that I hope you’re feeling better now. I was totally in that same exact boat (or trash junker) a couple of weeks ago. And I just had to second the idea that I too dread (and put off until the last possible moment) taking MYSELF to the doctor. In fact, when I DID go this past time, that very thing happened. I was all, “I’ve had a steady 102-103 temp these past three days with these blah blah other symptoms”. The young, healthy, perky, blonde nurse was all, “Uh huh. Let’s see what your temp is now. Oh look. It’s normal.” Stare. I felt like THIS BIG. (pretend that’s really small type -ha!) But, BUT! When the doctor came in, he looked at my throat, and goes, “WHOA! There is definitely something going on there.” They swabbed me for strep, and like two secondds later it came back positive. They sent me home with my gargles and antibiotics and pain killers, and I felt redeemed.
    Sorry for the rambling, but I just felt the need to let you know that. Mmm HMM. I get that. I really hope that you’re doing better. I know it’s hard to be sick when it’s you doing everything around the house, too. 😦 I feel your pain that way, as well!

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