So my grandma has cancer.

I got my blue eyes from her, Addie is named after her.

It’s weird to say, my grandma has cancer. I mean, cancer is really common and frankly she’s made it to almost 90 years old with nothing more than a bum knee and a bad eye. So to say “Grandma has cancer” is weird, because on one hand she’s lived for almost an entire century, it had to happen sometime. On the other hand, she’s lived for almost an entire century, why now? It’s bladder cancer and my mom has been keeping me updated on what’s going to be happening next, which is an ostomy. Turns out there’s a local company right here in Indy called Awestomy! and I’m going to see if they will make her a shirt that reads “Grandma’s got a brand new bag.” Because my grandma, she has a sense of humor. She also grew up in Oklahoma so the ‘Oklastoma!” shirt may be even more appropriate. Hallmark even has a whole bunch of funny “So, you have cancer?” cards and suddenly I find myself with someone to send them to.

She’s always been my more, well, frightening grandma. I can remember when I was Addie’s age my mom told me to ask my grandma to cut a grapefruit for me, I came up behind her in her chair and the thought of asking her to cut a grapefruit for me was terrifying so I decided I’d rather go without a grapefruit. She is a very no nonsense woman, a curmudgeon in the very best way.

You don’t mess with grandma, ever.

While I have always been a little frightened of her, she is also one of the most admirable women in my life. You see, she puts up with my grandpa and has for over 60 years. My grandpa turns 93 in a couple of weeks and while he’s still up and at ’em, he’s getting older too. Alzheimer’s. I visited them last month while I was in California and in my time there he made toast, twice. When I talked to my grandma about her cancer she wasn’t so concerned about herself, she was more worried about who would take care of grandpa while she was busy kicking cancer’s trash.

“Who knows how much toast he’d make if I weren’t here!”

“If I were cancer and looking for someone new, I sure as hell wouldn’t pick you.” I said.

She laughed. Even she knows you don’t mess with grandma.

Last year she had to put her foot down with my grandpa and tell him he could no longer work. He was getting lost on the way home, a home he has lived in for over 60 years. She confessed that having him home was exhausting but it was better for everyone that he wasn’t out on his own.

“If you ever get sick of him, you can always send him back to work and maybe he won’t find his way back!”

She laughed really hard.

I love making my grandma laugh because she doesn’t laugh at much.

So my grandma has cancer. My mom is on the front lines caring for both my grandma and my grandpa, she told me last year it’s hard to watch your parents get old. My grandma is determined as hell to get better so she can take care of my grandpa (she was a career nurse, while I sometimes wonder if she instilled the same fear into her patients that she instilled into me as a child, there is no one better or more qualified to take care of my grandpa’s hundred little quirks.)

Neither of them will live forever, and with how closely entwined their lives are and have been for the last half a century, the heart of one would never last long without the other. I’d like to think that if Cody and I make it to 67 years married and 90 years old we will be just like them. Fighting so hard, through cancer and Alzheimer’s, to stay together for as long as possible because we would each be lost without the other, even if we do drive each other nuts.

So my grandma has cancer. This is new territory for me. One one hand, my grandma has cancer, on the other hand? She is a fighter, not only for herself, but for the man she has loved for almost her entire life.

I took a yoga class at 6:30 in the morning on Saturday, which means I can feel every muscle that I’ve ignored for the past two years screaming that I’m a damn fool and I should probably do a lot more yoga a little more often. Add in the fact that I took the class in NYC the day after walking around the entire city and my hips basically feel like rock grinding on bone.

Don’t mind my grunting JFK airport! I just took my downward dogs a little too seriously on Saturday!

Before we talk about New York and how mad I am that anxiety messed with a good thing (my love and wonderment for the city) let’s finish up talking about Ohio. You know, that magically quiet and serene place I was in with my family this time last week?

As we drove through and over the mountains in Ohio I totally started to believe that we should cut all ties with society and move to a cabin in the woods. We would have horses, Cody would hunt and I would make bread from scratch. I would wear lots of plaid and have an impressive collection of work boots.

Then Cody said “I could never live out here.” and my little fantasy popped into a thousand tiny little splinters of dreams and wishes.

I said before that last Saturday will go down officially as one of the best days ever in Addie’s childhood and as a family. It started at 9 am with a trail ride up and through the mountains under golden leaves. I really need a horse. Could someone convince Cody of that? Our ride was at Spotted Horse Ranch and our cowboy guide was named Bob. (I think, I thought it was Buck, but regardless, he was charming and fantastic and everything you’d want from a man in wranglers, leading your horse.)

Lunch was at Ridge Inn, this is where I aside and say that we didn’t eat at a single chain restaurant while in Ohio, everywhere we ate was small and local and wonderful. Ridge Inn was especially fantastic because of the donuts. We hung around an extra hour waiting for the second batch of the day. THEY WERE STILL WARM AS WE ATE THEM.

Warm donuts.

More proof that life is very much worth living.

After the donuts we made our way to a KOA Campground (no, I will not spell it with a K) where we were promised gem mining at the Hocking Hills Gem Mine, this was what Addie had been looking forward to. We bought a big heavy bucket of dirt and sand and headed out to pan for treasures.

Addie and Cody finished the bucket off in no time and Addie was enamored with the “jewels and gems” she had found. Confession: I wanted to buy a bucket all to myself and find my own treasures. But there wasn’t time! We had a zipline to get to.

Our last scheduled stop was Hocking Hills Canopy Tours where the staff is pretty much the best staff in the entire world. Especially the guys that helped Addie with the zipline, she made fast friends with them and left them a positively glowing review on her comment card.

When asked “How would you rate your experience today?” and given an option of selecting 1 for ‘poor’ or 5 for ‘fantastic’ she wrote in 100 and circled it. When the survey asked her “What could we do better?” She wrote “Don’t ever make me get off.”

The zipline is a course of bridges and lines that she was able to completely traverse on her own, her line was snapped in at all times so there was never any risk of her plunging to her death, kind of an important feature to mom and dad. Traversing the track   twice was included in the fee ($39.) The next trip was $10 and any trip after that was $5. We let her go 5 times, she would have done it until the sun had set and everyone had gone home if we would have let her.

Ever since our trip to Chicago last summer I have told Addie that we’ll be going on an Addie/Mom trip for one weekend every summer. She chose New York for summer 2013 and as I began talking to her about last Wednesday she said “Mom? I don’t want to go to New York anymore. I want to go to Ohio again, okay?”

Me too kid, me too.

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Disclosure: Lodging, activities and some meals were provided for my family while in Ohio.

Day One in Ohio.

Day Two in Ohio.

Addie loved Ohio.

Other restaurants we ate at while in Ohio:

Inn at Cedar Falls – Super cozy and romantic cabin atmosphere, while it wasn’t a place you would normally take kids, they accommodated them wonderfully with coloring books and a legit kids menu. Cody had swordfish and shitake risotto, it pretty much changed his life.

Millstone BBQ– Tasty, tasty (and tender) pulled pork and plenty of cornbread. Worth the stop if you enjoy BBQ.

Brass Ring Golf Course – Lovely setting overlooking a tree lined golf course, very kind wait staff and the most spectacular chocolate cake looking thing ever. Addie and Cody inhaled it so fast I never even had time to take a picture.

Olde Dutch Restaurant – This is the restaurant I will dream of when I am PMS-ing and in the mood to eat nothing but warm comfort food and carbs.

Today I prepare to leave for NYC for a Blogger Summit with Pfizer about getting old.

Truth is? I lived enough wild and crazy life in my teens that the granny inside me is begging to come out to bake cookies for her grandkids and give those super good warm squishy hugs that only grandmas can give.

Cody will be tagging along, and while he’ll be off doing his own thing (re: eating pizza and cheesecake) it means a lot to me to have him in New York with me. Twelve years ago he asked if I’d like come with him to New York and that was when I knew I was going to marry him.

In the meantime on Shutterlovely:

Teach your children well and don’t let them grow up to be those buttheads who crowd the luggage carousel.

Don’t poop in front of people, especially the ones you make whoopie with.

And over on Toddler Times:

Hiking with a toddler in tow, it’s not for sissies.

We took Vivi to the COSI museum in Columbus. She was a fan.

If we suddenly won a trip around the world (or say, New York?) We’d probably leave Vivi behind.

Cody got a fist bump in the mall for (supposedly) being there by himself with both girls.

9 things Vivi, Percy and Wink have in common. (#3 – BOXES ARE THE BEST)

UPS delivered the best toy ever, it had a dryer drum inside.

And finally, 10 little tasks you can complete while your toddler is in the tub.

(Remember, slideshows over at Babble are all new and improved and won’t make you want to punch a wall!)

And finally finally? This is maybe the third or fourth picture IN EXISTENCE that has all four of us in the same frame.

We’re pretty cute.

These are two of Cody’s closest friends from law school, Cody is on the left (obviously) he is a loyal Broncos fan and has been since he was old enough to even care about football.

Steve is in the middle. The first time I ever met Steve he was in my front room jumping up and down, banging the wall and screaming at a football game on my TV .

On the right is Ethan. Addie’s future father in law. He is a Raiders fan.

Not exactly what you envisioned when you pictured a Raiders fan, right?

Cody and Ethan have sparred back and forth for years and one of their biggest topics of discussion is Denver fans vs. Raiders fans.

Example:

Perhaps he’s an accountant, or an IT procurement manager with a specialty in statistical analysis and data reconfiguration during the week, but a simple face painted Denver fan come Sunday.

Now let’s examine Raider fans:

I mean, maybe this guy specializes in IT during the week too, but he’s a lot more hardcore come game day.

Continue reading “show us your colors, get to the game. (sponsored by Tide)”

One of the very best things about you is that you are completely incapable of withholding emotion from your face and I, as your mother, know your face better than anyone.  I have spent many an hour tracing the perfect little triangle of freckles on your right cheek and twirling my fingers in your perfect little ringlets. I wish I could have a flip book of all of your emotions, all the subtle little motions that make your face so expressive and so, so Addie.

If I were to pick one of the ten best days of your life, today would be at the very top of the list. I took a hundred photos of you today and as I look back over them my heart gets overwhelmed with gratitude that you’re mine. We both decided today was the BEST! DAY! EVER! and I’m going to go ahead and say that this year has been the best fall ever. These past four days are going to be locked away in my heart forever and a constant reminder of how magical fall can be rather than worrying about the dark and dreary days of winter looming nearby. You’re a lucky little kid, and I don’t say that in a “SO YOU’D BETTER APPRECIATE IT AND STOP WHINING” kind of way, you see, when you were first born I had no idea how to give you a good life. How to make you happy. I had no clue how much went into parenting and to be honest there was a time I wasn’t even sure I was ever going to be able to provide you with a memorable childhood. I did fun things as a kid with my parents, but whenever I look back on a lot of them there is the very obvious stain of my parent’s divorce on almost every single memory.

I loved camping with my mom, but my dad was never there.

I loved going to Snowbird resort with my dad, but my mom was never there.

You are at an age where the memories we make now as a family are most likely going to stick with you. Today as we rode horses through the Ohio hills I thought back to how much I adored horses at your age and how there was no better place in the world than on the back of a horse. To this day, there is a little kid inside of me who still loves horses with a furious passion, so to see the same adoration and love on your face? My heart skips a beat that I was able to be with you in that moment today.

Even the softspoken and quiet cowboy who led our ride kept turning around to comment on the smile plastered to your face, at one point he even said “You’re proof that every little girl belongs on the back of a horse!” Later in the day as you zip lined across a mountaintop, your guide mentioned “I’ve never heard a giggle as infectious as hers.”

Your infectious giggle and enormous smile are a part of me. We may have our struggles, but child, you are magnificent. I get to watch as every adorable, charming and strong willed part of you adds up to something even more marvelous each and everyday I get to spend as your mom.

Some people will try and tell you that wearing your heart on your sleeve and every emotion on your face is a bad thing, and it can be if you are quick to offense or anger. But as you cultivate forgiveness, acceptance, patience and self confidence, your fierce and loving heart will bring you the very best of everything life has to offer. While it won’t always protect you from pain, it will allow you to truly appreciate the wonderful moments and blessings that come from difficulty.

I love you baby.

-mama

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I’m so grateful to partner with Hallmark in 2012 on their “Life is a Special Occasion” campaign again and I thank them tremendously for their patience with me, supporting me in all that I do and for sponsoring this post. Life with my family is the most special occasion of all.

Day two greetings from Hocking Hills, Ohio! (So perhaps technically it’s day four in Ohio, but it’s day two in Hocking Hills and day two packed full of fun and adventure, even a little bison.)

Day one can be found here.

Today started out with the best darn diner omelette I have ever had followed by a trip back to the washboard museum to pick Ami up her VERY! OWN! WASHBOARD! We then followed our itinerary which had us going to a store called Rocky Boots.

(OSU fans left in for scale.)

Much like the washboard factory I thought…well…okay? But we were promised they had a fantastic cafe and boy did they have boots (and camo EVERYTHING! They even had jammies for Vivi in camo but we were afraid we’d lose her in her crib if we put her to bed in them.) Lunch was indeed fantastic (proof I need more bison burgers in my life) and afterwards we headed to the Hocking Valley Scenic Railroad for a little train ride.

 

Here’s where I have to be honest, none of us particularly enjoyed the train ride enough to do it again, but to be able to take our girls on a good old fashioned train complete with the clickety clack and a fantastically loud horn, that was worth it. Addie said she’d like to go zooming around on a bullet train next time, I’ll be sure to work on that one kid.

After the train ride we drove through several national forests to the Vinton County Airport for a private ride with Scenic Air Tours to see the fall colors and Hocking Hills from the air. Our pilot was a doll, absolutely loved his job and even let me fly the plane. I FLEW A PLANE TODAY GUYS! I also got really, really sick on the plane. So did Addie. This was taken when the excitement was still high and the bile was still low in our stomachs.

Totally worth it though.

Rides start at under $100 and can be taken any time of day to pretty much anywhere you’d like (he offered to take us to Myrtle Beach but since we only had one sippy cup and no clean underwear with us we passed.) The visibility today was so great we could see smokestacks in West Virginia. (If you have a tender tummy, drop Dramamine like it’s hot before you go.)

After the plane ride we wound our way down a mountain and back up another to Ravenwood Castle, a B&B that looks just like a castle inside and out with absolutely lovely grounds.

(no, YOU can’t hold your camera straight.)

We didn’t actually stay at the castle, which is probably good because it had a far more romantic “couples only” vibe which we kind of ruined with our shrieking mandrake toddler. We were able to hang out, play a game of wizard chess and have dinner in the dining hall. The food was amazing, just like all the best stuff your grandma makes, but in a castle. (Also? Two Harry Potter references in two sentences. Brilliant.)

Vivi wanted to play checkers, or perhaps throw the giant checkers, but chess won out and Vivi pouted with her giant checker pieces.

Once again we returned to our hotel well fed and delightfully exhausted. This is the kind of place you come with your family every summer, fall, maybe even winter. It’s quickly climbing the “to do every year” list we’re compiling as a family. If you’re anywhere near here and haven’t ever been? This is my disappointed face. Fall colors will be at their all time best next week. Get planning.

(I should also mention Cody washed a pair of pants and a shirt on one of our new washboards tonight. HE IS A FAN.)

Disclosure: Lodging, activities and some meals have been provided for my family while here in Ohio. Also, my negative stereotype that Ohio is full of mean OSU fans has changed, everyone (EVERYONE!) we have come across has been SO nice, even the people in OSU gear.

ho-HI-ho: noun. What Addie called Ohio when she was 3.

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Today Addie declared she is going to become a professional naturalist, live in Ohio and take people on hikes and show them what plants they can eat, specifically the sourwood because that one is her favorite.

Surprisingly enough, Addie spent the morning with a very handsome young man named Joe who is a naturalist, takes people on hikes, shows them what plants they can eat and sourwood happens to be one of his favorites. In other words, we had a really good day and Addie has a new friend and role model.

Jim, the owner of Hocking Hills Adventure Treks said he’d have a spot waiting for her in about 13 years.

You know those fliers and pamphlets you can find in almost any small town touristy hotel? The ones that advertise the ‘world’s biggest this’ or the ‘world’s greatest that?’ Well this trip is basically doing as many of those pamphlets as possible. It was set up by some lovely ladies involved in Ohio tourism and we have done and will be doing things I never would have thought to do, and we’re having so much fun.

Today started out at a pencil sharpener museum.

Want to see Addie go bananas? Take her to a pencil sharpener museum. We then took a private guided tour of a nature preserve in Hocking Hills, Ohio. It’s downright stupid how pretty it is up here and what a good idea these treks are that Jim came up with. He gathered up a bunch of passionate naturalists, works with nature preserves and parks all over the area and plans these fantastic hikes where you get your own private know-it-all who will feed you roots, leaves and twigs (and you’ll actually enjoy it.)

Joe was our know-it-all today and he answered every question Addie had. When she asked about the dirt he got down on his knees and dug in it. When she wanted to see in a cave he pulled out a flashlight and showed her, when she sneezed he handed her a tissue and when she spotted poop he dug around in it with a stick to figure out what and who it came from.

 

Basically he’s the world’s greatest dad waiting to happen.

As if that weren’t enough, the hike ended at a huge cave where a Shawnee Indian named Wehyehpihehrsehnhwah was sitting and playing a hand carved flute, it was spectacular. He welcomed us in Shawnee and told us stories that his grandfather had passed on to him. He told us how many words we use everyday come from Shawnee (including hi, Michigan and Mississippi) and that the Shawnee  word for elk translates to ‘white butt.’ He showed Addie his flint knife, told her about his nose ring and said that if he didn’t keep his flute warm it would sound like he was killing squirrels the next time he played it.

He was amazing.

The fact that any Native American Indian tribe was ever persecuted or labeled as savages? Blows my mind.

Our next stop was the Columbus Washboard Company and museum. When I saw a ‘washboard museum’ on our itinerary I was a little…huh…okay…but you guys! We bought two washboards and Addie has taken hers everywhere with her since we left the place. Who’s going to have clean laundry when the world ends? THIS LADY.

Cody also bought a kazoo for the girls because he hates me and wants to send both of us into an early grave. We were given a tour of the factory by a charming man named James who showed us how the washboards are made on the same equipment they’ve been made on for over a hundred years and washboards are pretty much the coolest thing ever so don’t roll your eyes when you get one for Christmas this year.

We’ve eaten way too much delicious food, are trying to survive in one big hotel room breathing each others air and hearing each other sleep but it doesn’t really matter because we’re together and together with them is really my most favorite place to be no matter where we are in the world. (And we have a pool, Addie asked that I tell you all we have a pool, and little boxes of cereal in the morning, and washboards, we have washboards!)

Disclosure: We have been provided with lodging, activities, and some meals while in Ohio. Huge thanks to Ohio for being pretty darn awesome.

Cody and I are pretty average people, but together? Man, do we produce some swell offspring.

We’re like ketchup and mayo, put us together and we make fry sauce. (If you don’t like fry sauce, lie to me, I can’t bear the thought of someone not liking fry sauce.)

Perhaps peanut butter and chocolate is a better comparison, put us together? One of the best combinations in the world.

Eggs and bacon? Sure!

Cats and sunshine? Yep.

We’re having a few minor struggles with the bigger one, nothing major, she’s just proving to be a little more challenging in the “listening and rule abiding” realm.

It’s really easy to love the everloving daylights out of her because she has the biggest, kindest heart of any kid I’ve ever known. While there may be lots of shouting, pouting and some crying…there’s lots of hugging and adoration as well.

It’s just a phase.

I have to keep telling myself I’m doing okay. Sometimes I worry I’m so focused on not repeating the mistakes of my own parents that I’m completely borking up the things my parents did really, really well.

Kids raised in a home where good food is served, bedtimes are enforced, hugs are given freely, and where we do our absolute best to be good people, they have to turn out okay right?

Over the past few weeks I have hosted a few little get togethers around Indianapolis talking to parents about kids and cell phones. I personally don’t think it’s a horrible idea for kids to have cell phones as long as there are limits, Cody agrees with me but until I began working with AT&T I believed that the only way to manage kids and cell phones was on the honor system.

I’ve tried the honor system with Addie and guess what? It doesn’t always work so well. Addie also has a terrible, TERRIBLE habit of misplacing things. A phone? Pfft. That thing would be gone forever in a week. Still, there are times I wish I could let her ride around the neighborhood on her bike, just like I did as a kid, and not worry about her. What if she fell off? What if she got lost? A phone in her pocket would alleviate many of those fears.

AT&T has worked really hard at looking at real world problems that parents face when it comes to mobile phone safety as well as phones for their kids and they’ve come up with some really smart solutions to everyday worries.

Problem: I can’t resist answering text messages and phone calls when I’m driving!

AT&T Solution: Drive Mode. A free app available for AT&T subscribers on Android and Blackberry (coming soon for iOS) lets you input a custom message that auto replies to texts and phone calls while you’re driving. The latest update activates Drive Mode as soon as you’re traveling above 25 MPH (if the automatic activation is not enabled you simply have to activate Drive Mode with one touch from the App.) Let’s say I’m driving to Emily’s and she texts or calls me to ask “Where are you at?” she’d get an auto response that says “I’m driving right now so I can’t/won’t answer my phone. I’ll get back to you when I am able to. I like being alive and so do all these other people around me.” My text alert doesn’t go off so the temptation to respond is gone and Emily knows what I’m doing. Up to 5 phone numbers can be set to get past Drive Mode so you’re not completely cut off from important communication.

Continue reading “innovative mobile phone safety features (sponsored by at&t)”

Oh you guys! You really are the butter on my homemade bread, because after I admitted that I’m a clutter bug? You all rallied around not only me, but everyone else who commented and said there is happiness in chaos and stress in perfection! (Or something to that effect.)

Amy said “I’d love to see what those rooms look like messy. It always makes me laugh to see what others consider a mess.” Well Miss Amy, THAT is a very fair request because I totally agree with you.

A funny thing happened after looking at the photos I used in that post. I sat on the couch and looked at the picture of my kitchen, then looked into my actual kitchen. It clicked that I have a really nice kitchen and that half the stuff in it simply does not have to be there. Same with my dining room and living room.

Confession: I spent the last two days shame cleaning. Shame decluttering. Shame organizing.

AND DUDE YOU GUYS IT LOOKS SO GOOD.

I can see floor and counter surfaces I haven’t seen in YEARS. And I pinky promise I’m going to do my best to keep them clear. YOU HOLD ME ACCOUNTABLE OKAY?

In my flurry of cleaning I forgot to take any before pictures, well, except for one. What I lovingly refer to as “The counter of doom: Where junk mail goes to die.”

Yep. That’s what it has looked like for about three years.

Vivi and I spent an afternoon and $40 at The Container Store and now the counter of doom looks like this:

A place for everything and everything in its place!!

I basically had to just give up the “Oh I might use that one day!” mentality and go bonkers on tossing, recycling and donating. Not gonna lie, it felt good.

If you were ever going to stop by for a surprise visit, NOW IS THE TIME (just don’t go upstairs.)

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In the spirit of before/after and hows…I’ve lost 19 pounds in 24 days. But I don’t suggest doing it yourself. You can get the full story over at Shutterlovely (or click the photo below.)