If you’ve been around a while then you’ll know I met Cody whilst a manager of Frederick’s of Hollywood.

Who wouldn’t want to marry that right?

Anyway. With all the bra fitting and bra talking and bra this bra that I learned something about us wimminz. Something to bring up at your next playgroup. Because I promise there will be some funny looks after you pose this one question.

“How do you put on your bra?”

Are you a front hooker slider or a back hooker?

Go forth, discuss. Let me know how it goes.

(I’m a back hooker personally. I believe myself to be the minority.)

Stereotype would have you believe that as soon as Cody graduates we’ll be driving new SUV’s and living in the nice part of town with all the other doctors and lawyers. We will be going on family vacations to the Bahamas and have matching Ralph Lauren luggage and linen pants. Carefree! Rich! Raking in the dough!

Wrong.

The closer his graduation gets the more I realize that not only are we going to have to be grownups and buy a house with a water bill, a garbage bill, a sewage bill, a gas bill, no landlord to take care of the leaky faucets,  we are going to have loans to repay. Loans that will amount to even more than what a mortgage and two new SUVs would amount to; not that we’re getting SUVs but whatever.

I look forward to having a house after eight years of marriage, while at the same time I want to curl up in a corner and cry because I don’t feel old enough to be dealing with IRAs, stock portfolios, life insurance and mortgages.

Today I had an experience that angered/frustrated/humbled/outraged and opened my eyes all at once. I had to go see a doctor at a new clinic about some issues I’ve been experiencing. It was a low income clinic because we don’t have insurance, and medical tests and procedures are expensive. Because we go to low income clinics, the wait times are longer and getting appointments can be like trying to get a lunch date with the President. But hey, I’ll take what I can get.

After my appointment today I was made to sit down with a “financial counselor.”

I had been “flagged.” Apparently they thought I was trying to “mooch off the system.” They wanted me to prove to them that I was eligible for financial assistance for my medical care. Even though I had a card that said I was eligible for a discount on my medical care through their facility, they thought there had been an oversight and that I was to pay full price for a visit to their clinic. Their clinic was for people with “no insurance” and “strained financial situations.”

When did living off $1500 a month become a “wonderful financial situation”?

This is where I get nervous about writing what I want to write. Trolls? Stay back. I don’t mean this to sound the way you’re going to want to twist it and make it sound.

I’ve never really been put in a situation like this before, but as I sat there trying to explain to this man that my husband was in school and we were living off small amounts of borrowed money that isn’t even ours, I started to feel like I was being accused. Because someday my husband will (hopefully) have a decent income we should find some magical way to have health coverage? Or we should pay full price for our health care now? No, we’re not going to be in this situation forever, it’s only temporary. But I still needed to see a doctor whether my husband was a hobo or an attorney. And I’m still on a tight budget whether my husband is going to school to become a nose picker or a lawyer. Nothing is going to change that. And if there’s an option where I can get medical care for cheaper I’m going to take it. If you’re on a budget and there was a way you could save hundreds, if not thousands on your medical care, even though it meant longer waits and appointments made far in advance, wouldn’t you do it? Assuming you were eligible (on paper) to receive such care?

I’m frustrated. No, we currently don’t pay taxes, but in another year we will enter a tax bracket so ridiculous we’ll be sure to make up for lost time. And honestly after our experiences over the last few years I am grateful for taxes and taxpayers in a way I never was before. A lot of people honestly need a little help sometimes. Yes, there are those who abuse the system, but then there are those who just need a little something to get them on the right track. We are in the latter.

This is one of the reasons this election is so hard for me, and I’ve never really known how to get it into words. By the time the new president gets his policies into effect we will be in a different scenario than we are now; we will be taxpayers with a mortgage and we’ll be hanging out in a high tax bracket. But for now, for this election we are a low income family trying to gain an education without any easily attained health care.

So do I vote for the candidate who will best suit who we are now, or who we’ll be in anther year? I don’t want to forget about all the wonderful people I’ve met while in this situation, the doctors, nurses, social workers and government employees who do all this hard work without enough gratitude or glory for the people who honestly need help to get back on their feet. But at the same time I don’t want to be paying more in taxes than we are able to save or put towards our own loans or mortgage.

So there.

I’m afraid I come off as a whiny baby. Hopefully there’s some of you who have been through the graduate school thing or a rough patch and can understand. I’m not a whiny baby, I’m grateful for the great life I enjoy and the comforts and opportunities I have in this country. I guess the stereotype that comes along with being an attorney’s wife is starting to rub me wrong.

Bah.

Be nice. I will delete on this one.

Hi.

I haven’t been around much.

You see, a while back I got this email that was all “HI CASEY WANT A BLOGGING JOB?” and I was all “WHOASA YES I LIKE BLOGGING JOBS!” And then I got an email (okay like a hundred back and forth) that said “HI WE NEED 15 POSTS FROM YOU BY THE TIME WE LAUNCH THIS BAD BOY ON JUNE 2nd.” and I was all “WHAT? OKAY! GARFUBBLELEH…”

So I wrote fifteen posts, the site launched and I became a big rich blogging celebrity the end.

HA! Just kidding. More like I became a horribly confuzzled blogger who forgot to shower for a few days, complete with bags under her eyes and Oreo crumbs down her cleavage. Yeah, that sounds more accurate.

So anyway, unless you have a kid under six and you live in the Indianapolis area you could care less what I’m writing about over at my new gig. HOWEVER, if you have a kid under six and you live in the Indianapolis area I AM YOUR NEW BEST FRIEND.

You see, I now write for Savvy Source, a resource for parents on all sorts of stuff. (I’m sure their PR just loves that I said their site is about “stuff”) BUT! Even if you don’t live in Indianapolis there’s a darn good chance that your city has its very own Savvy Source writer. (There’s about thirty other writers that I know of and more on the way.) We’re all about finding the best stuff to do with your kids in your own hometown.

So that’s where I’ve been. Sorry. Busy busy busy. Plus all that time apparently NOT spent putting sunscreen on vital areas of my body.

Gah. So you should have me back now little blog. Thanks for waiting for me.

Sunscreen is in every corner of every bag and of every room of every part of my life. I apply sunscreen every day, to me and the moosh. The pool opened last week and we pretty much live at the pool come summer. Living at the pool=Sunscreen. My goal was to end the summer the same pale shade of pasty as I started the summer out as. Shouldn’t be hard with 87 ounces of sunscreen at my disposal at any given moment, right?

Whatever.

I covered myself in sunscreen on Saturday. I didn’t burn. I stayed pasty. Well, except for my shoulders. WHO FORGETS TO PUT SUNSCREEN ON JUST THEIR FARGIN’ SHOULDERS? Are you kidding me? Four hours at the pool with not even a hair shading my shoulders. GAH.

Even more reason to wear my crazy sun hat. What does my crazy sun hat look like? Crazy and big. That’s what. I can’t even find a hat online that even compares to the crazy bigness of my crazy big sunhat.

So to all of you who will see me at the pool, be prepared for the hat.

Because this sunburn garbage suh-huh-ucks.

How do you decide when to get your hair cut? Or colored? I personally find that one day I look in the mirror, see nothing overly redeeming about my hair except for the fact that it is growing and that it is growing out of my head. Much like it was on this day:

I then make an appointment about a week away, so I can think about my decision and wear my hair up in a ponytail all week so I can show it who’s boss. Problem this time around was I decided to style it on Sunday before I got it cut off on Tuesday. Big mistake.

My hair always behaves itself when it knows it’s going to be cut off. Kind of like how a three year old behaves when she knows there’s ice cream involved. But I know it was just a show, and it went back into ponytails for the next 48 hours.

Then there’s the dreaded “so what are we doing with your hair today?” question. I dread it. “Cut it off! NO! Long, but not frizzy, but I need body! But I don’t want short. I want to do it curly, but straight too. I spend a lot of time outside so I want something that can be pulled up, but funky you know? I don’t want to look like a calico cat but I don’t want to leave here looking like a normal haired person. But I don’t like cool hued colors, I need warm, but not orange! I like a lot of colors, colors that remind me of food. I need to go dramatic or I’ll regret it after I leave! WAIT! Not too dramatic! I am a mom you know…” Blah blah same thing every time. Some of you may remember the last time I cut off my hair. Gah. Nightmare. I was told by four different people I looked like my mom. Which isn’t bad but when one of those four people is your husband, well. Then things get a little iffy. I wanted to go to Whoorl but when I read in the New York Times she had 150 people in queue for hair Thursday, I figured I’d better start praying.

Thankfully I was referred to a genius of hair and from her nimble hands I am now caramel, copper and ruby with the ability to fluff, curl, straighten, pull back and funk up in a hundred different ways. I wanted to wait until I had all! sorts! of! styles! to show you, but I’m too excited.

So without further ado, the new moi.

I’ll keep you updated on any new follicular discoveries around these parts.

Let’s talk popcorn. Popcorn WINNERS.

First I used one of those random number pickers. This one to be exact.

First it came up with this comment by Beth.

“Hmmm, there seems to be a lot of popcorn fans out there!

I love me some Orville popcorn. When the bag just comes out of the microwave I pour it in a plastic bowl and then throw in a handful of regular M&M’s. The chocolate melts a bit and is a perfect combination of sweet and salt. It is the cheap mans version of Peterbrooke’s (local chocolatier) chocolate covered popcorn.

I also love, love, love chocolate chip cookies. When they are warm from the oven put a few in a bowl and then put a scoop of vanilla ice cream over them and hear them sizzle and ooze. Yummy!

…and now for the part where I kiss up. Your blog is seriously the first one that I check each morning. LOVE IT!”

Promise I didn’t pick it on my own from all the gratuitous comment blog love. Promise.

Our second winner is Nicole.

“I can’t tell you how long I’ve been counting down the weeeeeeks until So You Think You Can Dance came back on! It’s BY FAR the best show out there….especially in summer.

On to my snacks… our family loves ice cream. We’re totally ice cream people. But I will not allow an ice cream with a hardened chocolate in it in my house (ie: It’s gotta be Oreo and not chocolate chip)…cookie dough is the one exception to the rule.

You have to try my popcorn, though. A bag of popcorn (even butterless would work if you’re being healthy) sprinkled with fresh lime juice and….wait for it…hot sauce. YUMMY!”

And thanks to all of you who commented, made me undeniably hungry and made my grocery store trip today $30 more than usual. (The whole ham wrapped pickle with cream cheese was by far the most popular suggestion. Closely followed by hot popcorn tossed with M&M’s.) *drool*

Then there was the urban legend popcorns. A few of you mentioned Orville Redenbacher’s Corn on the Cob flavor, one of you thought it was a Canadian specialty. Another one of you wept because you were sure that Orville had stopped making it. Guess what?

Another one of you didn’t believe that Orville’s Buttery Garlic truly existed. I say NAY!

And then bunches of you agreed with my suggestion that Old Fashioned Butter is WHERE IT’S AT.

And then there’s the “Go big butter or go home” people. They balanced out the air/stove popped only crowd.

Note this, no one said they DISLIKED popcorn. Seriously. We all like it in different ways and combinations. But we pretty much all like it.

Remember the whole egg/syrup debate of spring 2008? Not only do some people not like eggs and syrup to touch, some people don’t even like eggs, or syrup. I’m pretty sure there was at least a dozen people who don’t even like breakfast.

Popcorn on Earth and goodwill to men. Congrats to the winners.

******

And in a completely random baking side note.

These are the best baking invention since individually wrapped sticks of Crisco. Seriously, little chunks of caramel that melt evenly, that don’t have to be unwrapped, go perfectly on ice cream and can be shoveled in your mouth handfuls at a time. Or, erm, uh. AND! No high fructose corn syrup!

Given that I’m about to bask in the glow of So You Think You Can Dance for the next two hours (OH HAPPY FLIPPING DAY) it’s a given that I am going to need a snack. Maybe several.

Now if I had my choice I’d me shoving Air Heads, Cheetos and Oreos down my gullet and breakneck speed.

But then I’d be kinda big. And unhealthy. And probably kinda sick. Not to mention I’d most likely poop funny colors.

So I have to choose wisely. Way more wisely than Air Heads, Cheetos and Oreos.

Which leads me to my list of of favorite snackish type things (and the moosh’s, gah I hate to share sometimes.).

• Avocado, cut into chunks with a wee bit of salsa and a sprinkle of garlic salt. Dip what you wish. Or just eat it straight out of the bowl. Whatever.
• Fritos (scoops) dipped into (4% large curd) cottage cheese. Did you snarl your nose? Dude, if you only knew.
• Cold pineapple(fresh only), a bit of milk (2%), some ice and a splash of vanilla. Blend the daylights out of it and OH BABY.
• Edamame (soybeans, I prefer shelled). Steamed, brought to room temperature and lightly salted.
• Ham (deli sliced) wrapped (Vlasic please) dill pickles. Okay, so sodium overload. But it’s only occasional.
• Artichokes. Steamed. With a little mayo to dip. My sister and I used to battle over the heart.
• Finally, popcorn and orange juice. But not just any popcorn. Only Orville Redenbacher’s popcorn is allowed in my house and I prefer it to be either Old Fashioned Butter or their new Buttery Garlic stuff (loooove). And yes, orange juice. Like peas and carrots. My dad and sister subscribe to the popcorn orange juice school of thought also.

After a very stressful day on the popcorn aisle when I was unable to find Old Fashioned Butter, (seriously, when they stop making something you so dearly love and are impassioned to? STRESSFUL.) I swore to never love again.

Turns out I was just at the wrong store. Old Fashioned Butter is alive and well. And on sale at Marsh. *phew*

Orville heard of my loyalty and offered up a couple of sweet gift packs of popcorn for me to give away. Want one? You know you do. I got one, well, I already ate it all, but I got one.

So here goes. Leave a comment, tell me you’re favorite snack or what popcorn you are loyal to. Let’s just say if it’s not Orville Redenbacher’s Old Fashioned Butter you don’t know what you’re talking about. (However I should give credit to the Buttery Garlic stuff, it comes in mini bags, Old Fashioned doesn’t.) I can’t sit on the couch for longer than an hour without popcorn. Seriously. Love.

Okay, contest. comment, tell me your favorite snack, your family’s favorite snack. A snack that holds a special place in your heart. I’ll pick two comments at random on Monday May 26th. Which means you have until Sunday May 25th at midnight EST to enter. And which also means you need to leave me a valid email address (no one else will see it but me.).

Good luck. I’m going to go pop some popcorn, I told myself I couldn’t have any until after I wrote this post.

Oops, forgot to hit publish. Heh.