a pregnancy acceptance speech of sorts.

Posted bycasey coombsPosted inpregnancy
  • First of all I would like to thank my body for taking on this task, I know it’s not an easy one, but man, you’re great.
  • Second I would like to thank a certain receptacle in my life for supporting me through my multiple heaves. You haven’t let me down once. You know who you are. *wink*
  • Third, I would like to give a little nod to all those pregnancy tests I mercilessly peed on, thank you for always humoring me and showing up with that second little pink line.
  • I would like to thank the kiwi fruit for always tasting good and for allowing this pregnant lady to poop on occasion.
  • I would like to thank the makers of cherry slushees although it would be much more convienient if the slushee maker were in my fridge door instead of a water dispenser. Just a thought…
  • I would like to thank Mexico for exporting your delicious Coca-Cola and allowing Costco to sell it. Man, I thought all hope was lost when I couldn’t find cola syrup in the drugstore anymore, but Mexican Coke? You’re just the greatest.
  • Where’s DVR? Is he here tonight? Man, DVR, thank you. Anyone who has ever worked with you knows why.
  • I would like to thank Phenergan for being cheap, generic and putting me to sleep so fast I forget to barf.
  • I would also like to thank my body pillow, my couches and various other soft surfaces in my house for accommodating so many naps.
  • Of course I have to thank my daughter for believing that that soft spot on my belly is in fact a a baby and not acknowledging it for what it truly is, a soft spot with a tiny lime sized baby somewhere underneath.
  • I would like to thank Ami, for selflessly arriving in your chariot of Cheerios simply to wipe my brow and scrub my toilets. I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to repay you.

*music starts*

  • I would like to thank those of you in the maternity wardrobe department. To those of you who have given of your clothes so selflessly when I realized mine were lacking to say the least. Even when you realized my bum is exponentially bigger than yours and that my legs are undeniably shorter than yours.
  • I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the multiple pregnancy apps I have downloaded and read each morning. You’re sage wisdom on soda crackers and ginger for nausea is simply invaluable knowledge.
  • And last but not least, I would like to thank Cody, my love, for having the balls to knock me up.

*music swells*

  • OH! The fans! I have to thank all of the fans out there on the internet that believed in me when I couldn’t even believe Oprah. You guys are the frosting on my cake. The marshmallows in my hot chocolate. The butter on my bread. The zofran in my medical cabinet. Thank you thank you!

40 thoughts on “a pregnancy acceptance speech of sorts.”

  2. OK, I love that you’re maintaining a sense of humor even though you feel so crappy. I pretty much curled into fetal position for 3 months until the nausea subsided a bit. My kids are 5 and 8 and I still remember the nausea. Hope you feel better soon.

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  3. hi there – i haven’t been a reader for long but i find your writing so lovely. i wanted to say congratulations on your pregnancy 🙂 – and also thank you for your recent tweets and posts about the temple being built in indiana. i’m not a particularly faithful person myself, but it spurred me to do some valuable research and you had some beautiful words on tolerance, acceptance, and understanding that can be applied to many faiths and beliefs in general. so *clink* here’s a toast to you and your awesome words 🙂

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  4. I adore you. I wrote a love letter to the maker of Preggie Pops during the height of my morning sickness, but my husband wouldn’t let me send it. I regret NOT sending it. 🙂

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  20. Aw, I love a good acceptance speech I didn’t have to dress up to read! In my head though; we were all dressed up in really hot gowns which made us look glowy and thin.

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  26. You? Are hilarious. And I keep meaning to comment and tell you how totally-crazy-happy I am for you, but just saying “congrats” doesn’t seem like nearly enough and saying much more than that makes me sound like a weird stalker lady since I know how badly you wanted this even though I don’t know you. Hmm.

    So I’m sticking with “I’m totally crazy happy for you”, but please know that I mean it. I mean, REALLY MEAN IT.

    And sorry about the barfing. 😉

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  30. You should get an award for that acceptance speech. Would that be redundant? Oh, and yea for anti-nausea medicine (especially the ones that come in an affordable generic).

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  33. “…for having the balls to knock me up.”

    Thank you, Casey, for the fit of giggles and the spray of soda that that little gem caused.

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  36. Hey girl!! If only you had a blog back in 2004 & wrote like this… you wouldn’t have been that sick with Addie!! So glad you are having a great experience so far with this pregnancy!

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  39. You, pukey lady, are a riot. 🙂
    And I have a sweet black peasant kind of maternity top that is oh so camoflaugey (however the heck you spell that) that I still have it even though it’s been nearly three years. I can send it to you if you’re interested. And I won’t be hurt if you’re not.

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